Wednesday, 20 February 2013

The Rhapsodic Bohemian

Is this the real life?

Market day seemed real, anyone can see...(on Greenorchid's double blog).
A fine day full of fruitful fun, fab fodder and fantasy friends (not that F thing again).
My funting frenzy has faded (stop it!) and my rhyming tourettes seems better.
It's left me feeling a little lyrical, which is nice. I need no sympathy.

My good thoughts are about my Bizarre Bazaar. I see staff wearing pinnies,
slippers and curlers, offering free tea with every purchase...
Ahhh... my global chain...Army and Leggy... Fresh Toes... The Body Parts Shop...
Is this just fantasy?

There's no escape from virtual reality at my shelfy shop.
We have to fit our treasure into three cubic feet of space soon.
Definition of space - 'total area of the universe', so that's fine.
I just need a Tardis tutorial.

There's no negative knickers here... but my enthusiastic elastic
is trembling with tension, hope it holds for launch day.

Little Miss Scissorhands wants to show you her positive pants so open your eyes,
look up up the skies and see...

And when it's foggy look for funting, any way the wind blows.
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on...

Crafty ways make lyrical days

EE xx

PS. If you are now singing Bohemian Rhapsody
I fear you may have caught a subliminal messaging virus!

Sunday, 17 February 2013

February made me shiver... I funted! ... no... I said FUNTED!
It won't keep you warm but you may feel a little glow of glee.

Let me show you how to make funting. A funtorial?

You will need :
One willing sewing machine (no tension seekers)
Some bias binding (or open-minded tape)
One fearless toy cupboard (get permission first)

If the sewing machine says yes then you can join the club or any suit really, even the jokers can play.
Now, nothing is safe...snap, lexicon, kan-u-go, countdown, monopoly money... I have even laminated some paper doilies to give them strength to carry on. I'm obsessed...sheet music, maps, comics, picture books...enough? I know it's just frippery but they look so cheery hanging around, don't you think?

If you fancy a game of Happy Families then forget it, mine are all stitched up and joined on, even Cluedo got the needle! Just pin across a mirror for a double whammy (so long as your back sides are pretty, as always).
And how about a no-sew quickie for that special person?

I can't get enough, I need more funtinspiration, am I going funtinsane? Any ideas ?

Moving swiftly on to 'The 12 Days of Thrifting' (see older posts). On the 4th day...
29 soldiers smiling, 4 builders trucks, 3 wooden trains, 2 baby trolleys, 1 dolls house and an articulated snake to scare me.

On the 5th day...10 Noah's pets, 3 spotty scarves, 2 easter eggs, 
1 cottage jug, 1 working crane and a guardsman without a buzz-bee.

It is very handy having 15 charity shops in my little town. 
Do you think that's excessive?
I could compile a nifty top fifty guide to the thriftiest towns in Britain 
or I could just make more funting and hang loose.
What do you think?

Crafty ways make funting days.

EE xx

Saturday, 9 February 2013

What shall we do with the DrunkenTailor?

To celebrate the 'Vintage and Very Nice' year of trading
I would like to share a virtual birthday cake with you all.
There's plenty for everyone so long as you
read the instructions VERY CAREFULLY...

All the usual stuff plus1 or 2 bottles of whiskey
Before you start, sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Good isn't it? Now go ahead.

Select a large bowl, measuring cup etc.
Check the whiskey again as it must be just right.
To be sure the whiskey is of the highest quality,
pour one level cup into a glass and drink it as fast as you can.
Savour the feeling.
Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teashpoon of sugar and beat again.
Meantime make sure the whiskey is as good as it was at first.
Cry another tup. Open becond sottle if neshessary.
Add 2 large leggs, 2 cups of fried druit and beat till high.
Shample the whishkey again to check it for consh...conshish...conshishtenshy.
Next sift 3 cups of salt or anything, it really doesn't matter.
Check the whiskewy. Fold in strained nuts. Wix mell.
Grease the oven and turn the cake pan to 350 gredees.
Pour the lot into the empty biskey wottle, stir it into the boven and ake.
Winish the friskey and bo to ged.

Crafty ways make dizzy birthdays!

EE xx